Thursday, November 24, 2005

Day of Giving Thanks

Every year on this Day the Nation observes the importance that we all acknowledge what we are thankful for (this is putting aside the whole pilgrim and Native American thing, that’s another blog topic). Now, im sure there are those who just do nothing or invite family and friends over so they can show off their new whatevers or even those who don’t believe they have anything to be thankful for. Well, I am thankful everyday for waking up and being blessed to have gotten where I am in life thus far and the energy to carry out my daily activities. However, I do see a purpose for this day so that we have the opportunity to stop and acknowledge what we usually don’t have the time or opportunity to appreciate. So on this day I am thankful for:

- The ability to have my tuition paid for in full
- My (maternal) Grandparents being alive and feisty
- My cousin coming home safely from Iraq to spend this day with the fam
- My friends, who are the best damn friends ANYONE could ask for
- My health and partial sanity (im just glad im not all the way crazy with all the shit going on in
the world today)
- All of the experiences (good, bad and indifferent) that have made me into the person I am
today
- My crazy, deranged, and down right dysfunctional family - who I would not change for the
world
- Two term Presidency (so that muthafuckin Bush can’t bring us any further towards the
apocalypse as he already has –get right with the Lord ya’ll)
- My ancestors who sacrificed their lives to ensure my place on this earth
- All the sistahs in the world who continue to pave the way for younger sistahs to have
opportunities and hope
- Cute shoes in size 10 1/2 and 11
- “Skinny” mirrors
- Internet pics of Nona Gaye and Rosario Dawson
- “Toys” wink wink
- Black people
- Caller ID
- And most important, me being able to still fit into my size 8 clothes


Until next time…what are you thankful for?

Sunday, November 20, 2005

new people are BAD!

After this year and meeting new people through academic and social situations I have realized that i no longer like "new people." I think im going to stick with the people i already know. I am too old to make new friends.

First there was, let's call her "#32", she captured my heart, then went crazy. I met #32 through a mutual x-"friend" - weird situation- and we hit it off immediately. She was the first person i "came out" to and the first woman i really really really cared for in an intimate way. It was going well - friendship building nicely, we traveled together, and the communication was great. All of that came to a screeching halt when the mutherfucker went crazy. She felt "obligated." Now this coming from a person who strongly pursued my ass. Then to top it off, had the nerve to cut me off over a TEXT MESSAGE!!!!! A text message ya'll, what the hell. That was worse than Carrie (Sex in the City) getting dumped by a post-it-note. Now i can laugh about it, but at the time.....HUMPH! We have since made amends, but it will never be the same. It’s a damn shame that i still really really really care for her and can't quite let go of #32, yet. O yeah, did i mention all this happened in like 6 months.

Second, although I knew this person, i allowed her "friendship" back into my life, and she brought some new and extra shit with hers. She is a bugged out chick i knew for about 6 years, let's call her "Crazy." Well Crazy managed to involve me in some o'l unnecessary drama, manipulate and tried to monopolize my 30th birthday celebration, and then talked about me like i was a dissenter from her majesty’s court. To let you know the extent of her "friendship" to me - Crazy, this chick she was diggin, and i went to the Village (in NYC) for a night out. After waiting forever on her we finally hit the town. Of course they were going through their stuff and i was the neutral party. At the end of the night, while driving Crazy back to her car in Jersey, she decided she wanted some privacy to talk with o'l girl about their drama. Now we are on 6th ave. and 8th street (in lower Manhattan), im in 4 inch heals, i live in Brooklyn and it was December (freezing cold). This mutherheffa asked my ass to find my way home so that they could talk. In a bit-o-rage i got the hell out the car and went home on the train - not smart, i know, but i was pissed. It took me 2 1/2 hrs to get back to the crib. After about 3 months of some more drama, she had the nerve to call me apologizing about everything and said i was her best friend and she went “temporarily insane" because she was blinded by emotions. Needless to say, i don't associate with that negret anymore.

Third, is the law student, lets call him "Bumpkin." He wanted to know everything about me, but in a stalkerish sought of way. He tried to "understand" me because i was sooo very interesting to him. However in doing so, he managed to insult me and my intelligence. Bumpkin was like that little boy in the 1st grade who hit you to let you know that he liked you. Well, Bumpkin said that i was a cliché, to tall, that everything in my life was an “alternative", and that i get off on being different, whatever the hell that means. He was just mad that he had no chance with me and that he was a 5ft 4in midget with an s-curl. Well, needless to say i don’t associate with that negro anymore.

Now i know that i will encounter more new people in my lifetime, just met another one last week, and some are going to end up being very cool individuals. However, my experiences just reassure the notion that there are some crazy muthersfreakers out there. So to all those who read this, beware, they exist. And be especially cautious with chicks from Philly, that's where Crazy is from.

Until next time....BEWARE!

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

MOTHER...


In a few weeks i will be living one of my dreams...i'm going to MOTHER Africa -Mali. I have been trying to visit Mali for FIVE long years and now the ticket is bought, immunizations are done and my visa is in process!!!!! I am sooo stoked. This is not just a vacation for me, i am going HOME.
It is stifling to only read about and research where you come from, with out a clear and face to face understanding of those facts. It's troubling to see people who look like you, but that you feel so disconnected from. It is life threatening not to be introduced to your greatness in person, so that you can continue the legacy. I am about to experience my knowledge, connect with my brethren/sistren, and see my greatness for the first time. If these white folks (and even some of us) were not ready for me as i am, they sure as hell ain't going to be ready for me after my MOTHER tells me her stories.

until next time....stay Black

Monday, November 14, 2005

JUST CLICK REFRESH..

If you think you're in dept, just check out what G. W. is doing to the Nation. http://www.brillig.com/debt_clock/
(when on the site, click your refresh button every 2 seconds and you will be amazed at the nonsense you see with the national dept)

until next time.. clutch your purse.

THEY DON'T KNOW ME

I was strongly advised, in order for me to get the most out of this blog i have to use it. I think that was sound advise, hence this entry and many to come.
The day that lead me to create my blog was about four weeks ago now. That day i realized, once again, that m.f.'ers who think they know me and don't, get on my damn nerves especially when you are dealing with adults you think are mature enough to understand real life situations. There is a brotha in my MBA program (lets call him "BM" for brotha man) who has miraculously figured out (or is trying to figure out) that I like girls (by the way, i am a girl) and is doing his damndess to bring his new findings to my attention (i don't know why, i already know i like girls!). So he starts on me by making dumb ass comments for an entire week. Maybe i was extra sensitive or maybe it is just a sensitive subject for me at this time, but BM's comments brought me to tears in the middle of class one day. Now why is he so interested? I have no f'ing idea. Only by the grace of God and the supportive words over IM from my sands, did i not kick that mutherfucker's ass all over the class room - pisses me off just thinking about his ignorant ass and audacity. This is why mugs be going off "for no reason" on people. He really needs to leave me the hell alone. Luckily for him, since then, he has left me alone with that mess. I think my attitude in the days following tipped him off that he was about to get got.
Before the beginning of this year i had not directly told anyone or seriously dealt with the fact that "i like girls" (as i like to call it) and for the most part it has been a positive thing especially that NONE of my people really tripped when i spilled the beans, hell one came out after i told her about me. Maybe because i have had such a smooth road on this journey thus far, i needed someone like BM to thicken my skin a little. But still, people can be a trip trying to justify what you do for their own "peace of mind." Well in the words of a very wise person i know "fuck'em in the eye."
Until next time...blessings

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

MY FIRST TIME...

Well i did it. It finally happened. My first... Get your minds out the gutta, i been did that. I'm talking about this being my first blog, silly. I hope to have a long standing releationship with her and tell her my inner most feelings. What am I sayin, this is free theropy!

Thanks Max for putting me on to the blog scene.

Peace